Brooklyn Heights
by Cloudsanshadows
Summary: Shikamaru is an underachiever living an undeachiever's life paid for with an underachiever's job. Temari is an art major with a serious attitude. Can she force Shikamaru to achieve his potential? Can Shikamaru get Temari to calm down? Or even survive her?
1. Chapter 1

Shikamaru and his friends had a tradition. The night before one of their birthdays they would all go to a bar and drink until it was their birthday. Tonight it was Kiba's birthday, and for the record Shikamaru would have been content to sit in the booth and drink the whole time, but his friends forced him to buy rounds for them all. So Tom begrudgingly got up and moved over to the bar, which is where he saw Temari.

Temari is an art major at Empire State, she also minors in drama. Of course Shikamaru didn't know any of that yet. In fact he didn't even know her name. What Shikamaru did know was that there was an attractive woman sitting on the bar stool to his right. She had her blonde hair done up in four ponytails. She was also wearing a black dress that cut off at her mid-thigh. The part that really got his attention though were the ripped fishnets she was wearing. She seemed to possess a kind of dangerous beauty.

"It's rude to stare." The girl said without even looking up from her drink.

"What are you my mother?" Shikamaru asked.

"Do you normally stare at your mother like you want to make a sleazy porn with her?" The girl retorted.

"No, and I don't stare at random bar floozies that way either." Shikamaru shot back. The bartender came and Shikamaru paid for 'the finest lager in the house.' which from the looks of the bar would be much cheaper than what was charged. Then, after a second take of the girl next to him he also ordered a beer for himself. The beer came first which Shikamaru quickly opened and took a swig from it. Now maybe it was the three and half beers in him already, or maybe he'd already been planning on saying something along these lines to her but either way Shikamaru was grateful for the excuse of alcohol. "Look," Shikamaru said turning to face her after the bartender handed him a pitcher of beer. "I just came up here to get beer for my friends." Shikamaru indicated the booth his friends were sitting at. "I have to go give them this booze now, so the way I see it you could either come with me and try to act civil or," He added in his bored tone. "I could just come back and we could continue this pointless argument."

"I have never been known to make things easy." Temari said mimicking his bored to death tone.

"I don't doubt it." Shikamaru said walking back over to his friends and giving them the beer.

"Dude." Kiba said. "Who's the babe?"

"No idea," Shikamaru said simply.

"I'd do her." Naruto said, Shikamaru just rolled his eyes.

"You'd do anyone."

"I'm offended."

"Well it's true." Ino said cutting in. "Seriously though you seemed to be hitting it off with her."

"Hitting it off?" Shikamaru mocked. "What is this the sixties?"

"Hey save the witty banter for her." Ino said in a way that was more an order despite the friendly context. Shikamaru just shrugged and walked back over to the bar.

"Sorry about that, where were we?" He asked sitting on the stool next to her.

"Well you were just childishly insulting me," Temari said. "But I'm not really sure where you were going with it."

"Eh whatever," He muttered. "My name's Shikamaru and you are...?"

"Thinking you'll have to try harder than that." She said sipping out of her glass.

"I'll buy you another drink." He said.

"And why would you do that?" Temari asked.

"Well for starters it's trying harder isn't it?"

"I guess," She said with a shrug. Then she turned and called down the bar. "Bartender, this guy's buying me another hurricane."

"You had to pick the most expensive drink?" Shikamaru asked.

"Please, nothing's really expensive in this place." Temari said. Shikamaru had to agree.

"Ok, so," Shikamaru said handing her the drink. "Name?"

"Temari," She answered.

Shikamaru was about to continue trying hit on Mia when his friend came up and broke the law of guys. He C-blocked.

"Shikamaru, Kiba's gonna start a fight if we don't get him home." Chouji said. Shikamaru groaned. Unfortunately he was the only one with a car at the moment so he'd have to take everyone home.

"Sorry," Shikamaru said getting up and putting his jacket on. "I'll have to try harder another time."

"Oh I don't know," Temari said casually sipping her drink. "You might've done enough for one night. Besides your friend looks pretty out of it." Shikamaru looked over to see Kiba literally falling out of the booth. He turned back to Temari only to be faced with a napkin being shoved in his face.

"Huh?" He asked intelligently.

"My number, give me a ring sometime." She said as she crossed her legs, an act which effectively removed any doubt from Shikamaru's mind about whether or not he'd be calling her.

"Alright, Goodnight Temari." He said heading out the door where Kiba was literally being carried out by Ino and Chouji. Shikamaru's car was a faded green pick up. With him driving, although technically drunk he wouldn't let anyone else drive his car. Ever. Ino and Chouji had managed to get Kiba into the bed and sat there with him to make sure he didn't hurt himself. Which left Naruto in the cab.

"You're a little to good at flirting," Naruto said as Shikamaru reached for a cigarette. "Anyone ever tell you that."

Shikamaru quickly lit and took a drag from his cigarette. "Someone might've told me it once." He replied. "Why? Besides you're not exactly helpless."

"Yeah but you man," Naruto whistled, he also rolled down his window. "You can find a willing female without even trying, it's like art."

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Shikamaru grunted. "Last time I checked I got the LEAST amount of action in the building."

"Well yeah, but that's only because you refuse to try." Naruto said. "Kiba hooks up with anyone who's willing-"

"So do you." Shikamaru said.

"Touche, and Chouji and Ino have wall to wall sex like every other hour."

"So it's simply through lack of trying?" Shikamaru said in a sarcastic tone.

"Well, the smoke doesn't help women see your finer qualities." Naruto said.

"I'm a college drop out who works at a grocery store five days a nights and a gas station those days." Shikamaru said. "I don't have finer qualities."

"And yet still you got the girl's number." Naruto said.

"Heh, I did didn't I?" Shikamaru chuckled as he looked at the numbers jotted down on a cocktail napkin. When they got to the apartment building the sun was already coming up over the skyline. It painted the whole city a faded red through the polluted haze. Shikamaru went around back and helped Ino and Chouji with Kiba and they carried him up the front steps while he mumbled on about something. Naruto held the door open to his and Kiba's apartment and the group dumped Kiba rather unceremoniously on the couch.

"Well, goodnight guys." Shikamaru called over his shoulder on his way out. He walked the three flights up to his apartment and opened the door. Shikamaru's apartment was by no means glamorous. As mentioned before he didn't exactly have a pro-ball career. It was pretty bare, with white walls and wooden floors. The kitchen was separated from the living room by a counter, the living room doubled as a bedroom thanks to the mattress flopped down on the floor, and the only part of the room that actually showed character was the bookcase in the corner brimming with books from as far back as his childhood and as recent as the David Copperfield and Great Expectations he had purchased last week. Next to the bookcase there was a Lay-Z-Boy, which was probably the most expensive thing in his apartment, and a lamp. Most nights, when he did sleep, Shikamaru fell asleep with a book in his lap in the Lay-Z-Boy. As the sun pierced the sky Shikamaru's apartment was illuminated the same melancholy shade of red as the rest of the city. Tom surveyed his apartment and gained a sense of comfort from the room. No matter what ever happened, no matter how bad a day he had, he could always come home to his familiar, if somewhat drab, apartment. It wasn't much, but it the pale red light of a city sunrise it was home. As Shikamaru looked his apartment over once more he noticed something that might pose a problem when contacting Temari. He didn't own a phone. _Oh well,_ He thought. _I'll figure something out in the morning._


	2. Chapter 2

Shikamaru groaned. His alarm clock was screaming at him to wake up. _Doesn't it understand I barely ever sleep? _Shikamaru thought angrily glaring at the alarm clock. It continued to emit an annoying static-y noise oblivious to his seething hatred. The clock was supposed to double as a radio but all he ever got was static. He crawled out of bed and unplugged the clock. He then sat in the Lay-Z-Boy and fell asleep again.

He woke up a few minutes later to Chouji banging on the door. Shikamaru grumbled, then decided he would not get up. The banging persisted. He sat there tried to ignore it. Five minutes into the knocking Shikamaru gave in.

"What?" He snapped as he opened the door.

"Uh, Ino kicked me out." He explained.

"What'd you do?" Shikamaru asked.

"Uh well remember last weekend when we were at the bar?" Chouji asked.

"No."

"You were hitting on that girl." Chouji said.

"Temari."

"You remember her name?"

"Why are you so surprised?"

"You don't remember anyone's name!" Chouji said. "You forgot Gary's name in highschool. You went through half the year calling him Simon!"

"Uch, it happened once."

"No," Chouji declared. "Remember senior year when you slept with Jessica?"

"No."

"You thought her name was Amy."

"Oh her,"

"And then on the road trip you thought Jack's name was-"

"Ok I get the point!" Shikamaru groaned. "What did you do last weekend?"

"Well apparently I got hammered and started texting this girl I used to have a thing for."

"Simone?"

"Rachel, good try though."

"And…?"

"Well Ino threw me out."

"You had to do more than that."

"I-"

"Whatever, you take the bed, don't touch my orange juice or ramen. There's barbeque in the fridge." Shikamaru said brushing by him and walking downstairs. He knocked on Ino's door. "Blondie open up."

"What?" Ino asked yanking the door open. "Oh it's you."

"Brilliant observation." Shikamaru said. "Why did you throw Chouji out?"

"I don't see how that's your business." Ino declared folding her arms.

"He's crashing in my apartment." Shikamaru said. "Now is there anything besides him texting Simone-"

"Rachel."

"Whatever," Shikamaru said aggravated by the interruption. "Anything else?"

"No." Ino said. "I don't want him living here anymore."

"I can't kick him out, he's my friend and I have a spare bed."

"Well get rid of the spare bed!" Ino snapped.

"Uh, no." Chouji said. Then he stopped talking. Ino had that glint in her eye that she always got when she demanded something troublesome that Shikamaru was too lazy to argue against. "What?"

"You were hitting on some girl last weekend." She said.

"Temari."

"You remembered he-"

"Yes, skip it what's your point?"

"If you start sleeping with her you won't have a spare bed!"

"Uh, if we were sleeping together wouldn't we be sharing a bed?"

"Shut up Shikamaru." Ino demanded. "I know you're planning on sleeping in the Lay-Z-Boy while Chouji crashes, but no woman ever would sleep with a guy on a Lay-Z-Boy so you'll have to kick him out!"

"Uh Ino-"

"Have you called her yet?" She was yelling now. Shikamaru flinched. "No of course _you_ haven't, you probably thinks it's too much trouble."

"Well I was planning to… eventually." Shikamaru mumbled.

"Then do it!"

"I don't have a phone." Shikamaru said.

"Here." Ino said and lobbed hers at him. He caught it and just stared. "What?"

"Having a cell phone seems to complicate everything." Was all he said in response. "Also I lost her number."

"No you didn't."

"What do you mean?"

"Kiba took it because he said you'd lose it."

"Friggin' twat." Shikamaru grumbled, not that Kiba was wrong.

"Go get it." Ino said pointing to the door. Shikamaru left grumbling something about how troublesome his friends were. He didn't bother knocking he just stormed in and shoved Kiba off his bed.

"Ah! Dude what the fuck?" Kiba asked angrily.

"I need Temari's number."

"Who?"

"Girl I was hitting on last weekend."

"You remembered her name?"

"Shut up and give me the number." Shikamaru said holding out his hand. Naruto stumbled into the room.

"What's with all the noise?" Naruto asked, then he saw Shikamaru. "Hey Shikamaru."

"Hey Naruto," Shikamaru said.

"Here for that girl's number?"

"Temari."

"You remembered her-"

"Next person that says that gets a pen in their throat." Shikamaru snapped.

"Sure, sure," Naruto said, he had discovered long ago that Shikamaru's threats just meant he was tired. "It's on the table."

Shikamaru snatched it up and went out into the hallway. Inowas waiting there impatiently. He looked at her.

"What?" She shouted.

"Why are you here?"

"I'm not gonna let you screw this up." Ino declared.

"Ino, relax, I can pull women." Shikamaru said. He dialed the number and waited. It rang. It rang.

"Hello?" Temari's voice crackled over the line.

"Hey, Temari?"

"Yes who's this?" Temari asked.

"It's Shikamaru,"

"Shikamaru…?"

"We met at a bar last week, I was that charming and funny guy."

"I don't remember that."

"Ok fine I'm the one that kept insulting you and had to leave cause my friend got hammered and wanted to fight."

"Oh, hi Shikamaru,"

"Hi Temari," Shikamaru said. Ino reached for the phone.

"Let me talk to her."

"I was wondering when you were gonna call."

"Yeah, sorry," Shikamaru said elbowing Ino. "I don't actually have a phone so I'm using my friend's."

"Oh,"

"Yeah, uh, you want to go see a movie some time? Or maybe grab lunch?"

"Uhh…" There was a scuffle on the other end.

"Shikamaru?"

"Yes,"

"This is Mitsou, I'm Temari's roommate. She was about to play hard to get but the truth is she's been waiting around the phone for your call all weekend and she'd love to-"

Shikamaru heard the distinct sound of someone getting elbowed in the face and winced. "Shikamaru?"

"Yep,"

"Pick me up at three."

"Cool," Shikamaru said and hung up the phone. He had to explain everything to Ino and then Ino explained to Kiba and Naruto and when Chouji came downstairs to see what was going on Ino had to be held back while Chouji ran back upstairs. The whole situation was a pain so Shikamaru went out to smoke.

At two thirty Shikamaru got into his pickup truck and drove to Temari's dorm. With traffic being traffic he got there thirty minutes late. Temari was sitting on the curb. The first thing Shikamaru noticed is that her hair was now red. She was wearing a black tank over a mesh shirt and tight jeans. She got in and punched his shoulder.

"What was that for?" Shikamaru asked?

"Being late," Temari said, and then punched him again.

"Ok, why?"

"You were insulting me last week and I never got you back."

"Ok, if we go on this date no more punching." Shikamaru said.

"Oh don't be a baby, it's not that bad." She said smacking his shoulder _AGAIN._

"You're not as clever as you think." Shikamaru said as he started to drive. He braced himself against the floor and slammed on the brakes. Temari's head shot forward into the dash.

"Ooh you're gonna get it now." Temari threatened.

"Oh bring it on ginger." Shikamaru said with a laugh. Without further violence he drove on.


	3. Chapter 3

"Dude you are so dead." Shikamaru said button mashing his controller.

"Sure, you said that the last five deaths" Naruto said shooting him in the head again. Shikamaru button mashed some more and managed to shoot Naruto.

"Haha yeah motherfucker!" Shikamaru yelled. Naruto just laughed and shot him again. Game over. "Well fuck."

"You're a sore loser." Naruto said.

"You're a friggin' melonfucker." Shikamaru declared. Naruto just rolled his eyes and got up to get some beer from the fridge. He got a six pack and tossed one over to Shikamaru and one over to Kiba. On weekends if they weren't getting drunk in a bar the friends were getting drunk at home. They would have a COD tournament which Shikamaru always lost because he grew up without video games. Shikamaru was on a bean bag, Kiba was lying down on a couch, Chouji was eating pizza, and Naruto was chugging his beer. Ino usually joined them but decided not to this time on account of her PMSing and she'd probably attack Chouji with the controller.

"So," Kiba said as Shikamaru passed him the controller. "What happened with that girl-"

"Temari."

"Right," Kiba went on. "What happened with Temari last week?"

"We snorted coke and woke up in a Mexican jail." Shikamaru said cracking open his beer. "I had to tunnel my way out with a spork." Everyone just looked at him like he was crazy. Shikamaru shrugged. He drank his beer. "She got drunk and we screwed in the back of the truck."

"Seriously?" Chouji asked, interested only for the sake of his housing situation.

"Nah," Shikamaru said getting up. "I gotta hit the head, peace bitches."

"Get a good seat." Chouji quipped. Shikamaru went to the bathroom and pissed. We'll leave it at that and join Temari in a similar yet very different situation.

Temari was in art class picturing various ways to kill her professor. She hated this class so much but unfortunately it was necessary for her major. The class was in the middle of painting. Temari normally liked painting, but her cunt of a professor insisted that all the students paint the same thing the same way. How he ever got to be a teacher was beyond her. So as she painted the tree she thought about beating the professor to death with a paint brush.

"So Temari," Mitsou leaned over and whispered.

"What?" Temari snapped. Mitsou was completely unfazed by Temari's anger because she knew it was really directed at the asshole in charge.

"How'd it go with that guy last weekend?" She asked wagging her eyebrows suggestively.

"We snuck into the Met and spent the day running away from security." Temari said with a straight face. "We would've been fine if he hadn't tackled one of them into the Christmas tree."

"Seriously?" Mitsou asked.

"No, he took me to a strip club, got hammered and fell asleep." Temari said.

"Ok you lie!" Mitsou whisper/hissed.

"Yes I do." Temari said. The professor cleared his throat and glared at the two girls. Mitsou hid behind her canvas and pretended to paint a leaf, Temari glared back and flipped off the teacher. She got kicked out of class.

Temari walked back to her apartment. When she got there she did what art majors in college do. She toked up. A few minutes later there was a knock on her door. Temari hid her bowl and went to see who it was. It was just Mitsou. Temari opened the door and Mitsou walked in.

"That professor is such an asshole…" Mitsou started but then stopped and sniffed. "Give me the bowl."

Temari passed Mitsou the bowl and she lit up too. Mitsou passed Temari a DVD and motioned for her to put it in. Temari looked at the DVD, _Fritz the Cat_. She popped it in. The next two hours were spent cracking up or wearing a 'what-the-fuck' expression. At the end Fritz came back to life and started screwing the girls.

"Ok what?" Temari asked as the credits rolled.

"That was hilarious!" Mitsou was laughing.

"That was trippy." Temari declared. _Maybe it's the weed._ She thought. It wasn't.

"So, I still wanna know what the hell happened with that guy." Mitsou said munching on some Doritos.

"Hang on," Temari said getting up. "I gotta go to the bathroom."

-What Really Happened-

"So where do you want to go?" Shikamaru asked after Temari finished hitting him.

"What?" Temari asked. "I'm supposed to know? I thought you'd have a plan."

"Well, I do." Shikamaru said with a shrug. "But it was mainly just in case you didn't have a plan."

"I do not have a plan so there." Temari stated plainly.

"Tch, troublesome." Shikamaru muttered.

"What was that?" Temari asked raising her hand threateningly.

"Nothing," Shikamaru said, he rolled down the window and reached for a cigarette but Temari snatched them off the dash before his could grab one.

"So why do you smoke?" Temari asked.

"Huh?" Shikamaru asked, but he was already composing an annoyingly complex answer to her relatively simple question in the hopes that it would end the discussion. He did not know Temari well.

"Why-do-you-smoke?" Temari repeated.

"I smoke because it creates a win-win scenario between me and the people around me. See if I smoke most people will look down on me and simply think that I'm a self-mutilating, disgusting person and judge me over one thing while hardly knowing me. So by smoking I provide people with the opportunity to look down on me and feel better about themselves while at the same time effectively filtering close-minded douches from befriending me." Shikamaru said.

"That's crap." Temari declared. "Tell me the real reason."

Shikamaru laughed, she was right. "I like the taste and I've accepted that I will die whenever I die so I'm not overly concerned

with my health, besides if something is going to kill me it might as well be something I enjoy."

"Hn." Temari thought about it for a minute. "I bet you won't like being hooked up to a breathing machine."

"Yeah maybe not," Shikamaru conceded. "But first I'll have to make it to that point. Who knows I might get hit by a car Shikamaruorrow."

"Yeah, but you might not, and then you wind up spending the last few years of your life in a hospital bed dying slowly." She argued back. _This isn't going anywhere_. Shikamaru thought to himself.

"Oh, we're here." He said pulling over. Temari looked out the window and got a this-is-it? look on her face.

"Uh, McDonalds?" She asked raising an eyebrow.

"I really had hoped you'd have a plan." Shikamaru shrugged.

"Tsk, lazy bastard." Temari complained.

"Whiny bitch." Shikamaru said getting out of the car. Temari elbowed him and he fell onto the asphalt.

"Insulting me won't get you anywhere." She sneered.

"It got me you're number." Shikamaru said. Then he thought about it and got back in the car. "C'mon I got a better place."

"I hope its Burger King." Temari said sarcastically. Shikamaru ignored her and turned on the radio hoping it'd keep her quiet. Actually he put in a Metallica tape and Temari started headbanging. Shikamaru started laughing quietly to himself. After about an hour of navigating traffic Shikamaru pulled over by a little pub in his neighborhood. He managed to get out of the car without being attacked this time.

"Nice place?" Temari asked with genuine curiosity.

"Actually," Shikamaru said. "It's a shit hole."

"Oh… then why?"

"Eh, it feels like home." Shikamaru said holding the door open for her.

"It is the twenty first century right?" Temari asked him.

"Y'know feminism killed chivalry." Shikamaru said. He ordered a beer and a cheeseburger. Temari asked for a salad… the bartender laughed. Temari glared and ordered a hot dog. Looking around Temari noticed Shikamaru hadn't lied. The bar was pretty rundown. She could see the dust and dirt on the tables in the back corners. The booths all had graffiti and bumper stickers on them. Despite it all though it did feel welcoming. It was like 'we suck so we won't judge' but in a nicer way. With the weak ceiling fan-light the whole place took on a nice rustic feel. Then she noticed Shikamaru was giving her a look.

"What?"

"You had to order the phallic shaped food?" He asked.

"Shut up perv." She said. So over the course of the meal Shikamaru learned that Temari's painting teacher sucked and all the violent ways she would kill him if she could, which oddly enough didn't scare him. Temari learned more about Shikamaru's friends than Shikamaru himself but the stories were funny so she didn't read too much into it. They shared the belief that Valentine's day was stupid and that pop music sucked. They both skirted anything that might force them to talk about family. It was a pretty good afternoon, so Shikamaru decided to drop her off before he screwed stuff up. So he dropped her off and drove home before he reaInoed she still had his cigarettes.


	4. Chapter 4

"So happy birthday." Temari said kissing Shikamaru. The group was sitting in a booth in a crappy roadhouse upstate. It was rundown and they were probably the only people there that didn't ride Harleys. The bar had topless girls dancing on it and the jukebox was playing paradise city. Naruto was dancing with the girls, Ino was getting hit on by some biker, Chouji was drowning in Captains like there was no Shikamaruorrow… and if he kept chugging there might not be for him.

"Come on man," Kiba said pulling Chouji out of the pitcher. Mitsou laughed.

"I think its cool how you look out for your friends." Mitsou said sliding next to Kiba.

"Oh yeah," Kiba said sliding his arm over her shoulder. "Well… let's get a sixer and you can tell me what else you like about me."

"Don't push your luck." Mitsou said. Shikamaru noticed that she didn't move away, actually she got a little closer. _Oh man, here we go…_ Shikamaru said.

"Yo," Shikamaru called to the waitresses. "Jack all around, leave the bottle."

"Except for Chouji," Kiba said out of the corner of his mouth.

"Right except for Chouji." Shikamaru corrected. Noting that Kiba was moving in for the kill Shikamaru decided to amend his order.

"Better make it two bottles… oh and see the guy dancing with the topless girls?"

The waitress nodded. "What about him?"

"He thinks you're body is rockin'." Shikamaru said. And with that the waitress went on her way. She came back and left them a

large sum of alcohol, then she went to go pull Naruto into the bathroom. Now somewhere in the night Kiba and Mitsou slipped away, Chouji passed out. Ino was off doing her own thing and Naruto was doing the waitress. Shikamaru wasn't exactly coherent after the fifth bottle made its way to the table so Temari decided to take him to the pickup truck. She had it all planned out. She'd lay him down in the bed and they'd just relax until the others made their way out. What she didn't count on, well for starters was how heavy Shikamaru was, and secondly was Kiba and Mitsou having beat them to the truck.

"OH MY GOD!" Temari shrieked. Kiba looked up and so Mitsou screamed. They both scrambled for their clothes.

"Dude," Shikamaru said, trying his best to sound sober. "What were you doing in my truck?"

"Your girl's roommate." Kiba said with a shrug.

"Not cool." Shikamaru glared.

After everyone had managed to make it out of the bar in various forms of undress the group went home. From one 'til three they sat on the benches lining Brooklyn Heights. Shikamaru had his arm around Temari, Naruto had the waitress in his lap, Kiba was passing out beer with Mitsou and Ino and Chouji were passed out. _Friggin' lightweights._ Shikamaru thought cracking open his can of beer.

"Hey Kiba," Shikamaru said. "You always carry a pocket knife right?"

"Yeah." Kiba said handing a beer to Mitsou.

"Give it to me." Shikamaru said holding out his hand.

"Why?" He tossed a beer to Naruto.

"So I can gouge my eyes out."

"Ha, it was a beautiful natural act Shikamaru." Kiba said sitting down.

"It was a flying camel." Shikamaru glowered.

"So Kiba finally committed a sexual act in something you own?" Naruto asked. "He cannot keep it in his pants to save his

life."

"Two words Dave." Kiba declared. "John-Mayer."

"It was dark!" Naruto said in his defense.

"Hold up," Temari interrupted. "What's a flying Camel?"

"It's when the guy is doing he-"

"We really don't need to talk about it." Mitsou cut Naruto off.

"No I wanna know too." The waitress said.

"Well he's doing her in the-"

"No, no we'll talk about it later." Kiba said. "Besides we still need to get Naruto a purple heart."

"You were in the army?" The waitress asked. Shikamaru couldn't help but snicker.

"Not exactly," Kiba said with a smirk.

"Shut up guys."

"He did jump on a grenade though." Kiba said. Everyone burst out laughing.

"Man, shut up you did your best friend's sister! Bro-foul!" Naruto declared. Shikamaru just shook his head grinning, and drank

some more.

"Hey," Temari whispered.

"Yeah?" Shikamaru asked still grinning.

"I had fun tonight." She said.

"Who said the nights over?" Shikamaru asked. "It is my birthday after all."

"Hmm…" Temari said. "Promise you'll respect me in the morning?"

"Do I respect you now?" Shikamaru asked. That earned him an elbow to the gut. "Oof, ok promise. Besides, it's the morning

right now."

"You know what I mean." Temari said. "I'm not a slut."

"Never said you were." Shikamaru said. "Besides, slut, whore, man-whore, they're all just terms of judgment, it's about perception."

"That hasn't stopped you from calling me a man-whore!" Kiba said.

"Yeah same!" Naruto declared.

"Well I perceive you guys as man-whores, I don't think Temari's as cheap as you." Shikamaru said walking… stumbling back to the

truck.

"I'm not cheap." They both said at the same time.

"It takes a six pack and a chick to get you into the sack, relax man, I'm a guy too, we're all the same." Shikamaru said as he

fumbled with the keys. Finally he got the car started and they drove back to the apartment. "Find your own way home guys."

"Bros before hos!" Naruto shouted at the trucks rear bumper. Shikamaru laughed. They pulled up to the apartment at around four and Shikamaru had become slightly more coherent. They stumbled upstairs laughing every time they would trip. Eventually they got to Shikamaru's room. Temari got her pants off and tried to unbutton her shirt but Shikamaru just tore it off of her.

"Hey!" Temari said before Shikamaru covered her lips with his.

"I'll buy you a new one." Shikamaru said when they finally broke.

"With what money?" Temari asked with a smirk. Shikamaru grinned back and lifted her up, hitching her legs around his waist.

"Ok, I'll steal you a new one." He said biting through her bra. He was still a little drunk so he leaned against a wall while they made out until he wanted more, then he just turned around and slammed her into the wall. Mi was laughing while Shikamaru pounded into her. She groaned when her back smacked against the wall and Shikamaru got the message. He swept his table clean and threw her down.

"Ow." Temari said not really minding.

"You'll live." Shikamaru said leaning down into her. The rest of the morning was just sex. Angry, rough, drunken sex.

Eventually they were both spent and Temari lay back on Shikamaru's bed. Shikamaru grinned looking over her naked body in the morning sun. He was a college drop out with no prospects. He had done very well for himself. He grabbed some cigarettes and climbed out onto the fire escape to enjoy a smoke after sex and the quiet morning. The only time you could ever find quiet in Brooklyn.

Temari relaxed for a few minutes to catch her breath. Then she got up and joined Shikamaru on the fire escape. She plucked the cigarette out of his hand and took a long drag.

"I thought cigarettes were bad for you." Shikamaru said with a smirk.

"I can indulge every now and again." Temari said smiling. They sat there in silence for a while just enjoying the sight of a

peaceful New York city. After a few minutes Temari broke the silence. "So happy birthday." Shikamaru started laughing. "What?"

"That's it?" Shikamaru said between laughs. "We were having a real moment here and the best you have is happy birthday?"

"Aw shut up." Temari said smacking him and taking another drag. "Not every line can be something deep and philosophical.

"I guess you're right." Shikamaru said kissing her again stealing her smoke.

"Well, now what?"

"Now?" Shikamaru asked. "You make breakfast."

"You're a chauvinistic ass."

"Yes I am." Shikamaru said taking his cigarette back. Temari climbed back into the apartment and started making some pancakes. Right when Shikamaru was beginning to zone out again a voice came from the side walk.

"Oh my boy got it in!" Naruto called.

"What else did you expect?" Shikamaru yelled down.

"Way to go bro." Kiba hollered up.

"Where's Temari?" Mitsou asked.

"Making breakfast." Shikamaru said with a grin. Temari ran up to the window and smacked him. _Well, it better than last year's birthday._ Shikamaru thought wistfully.


End file.
